The Republic of Biaten is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Chancellor Siegel with an even hand, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, daily referendums, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 7.675 billion Biatenians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The large, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Healthcare, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hachen. The average income tax rate is 95.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Biatenian economy, worth a remarkable 1,310 trillion Thalers a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 170,686 Thalers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Snitches get riches, the nation's beloved 'good-natured doormat' is inundated by begging letters, snap elections are called whenever there's a chance to increase Chancellor Siegel's majority, and guide dogs for the blind have been seen using government websites. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Biaten's national animal is the Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Biaten is ranked 12,240^th in the world and 33^rd in The Western Isles for Lowest Crime Rates, with 97.46 law-abiding acts per hour.