by Max Barry

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Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 3,101stLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3,708thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 5,226th
The Company of
Let's make nothing but money
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Bear Stearns

Population5.608 billion

CapitalNew York
LeaderChief Executive Officer Jim Cayne


The Company of Bear Stearns is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by Chief Executive Officer Jim Cayne with an even hand, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, pith helmet sales, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 5.608 billion bankers enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

The minute, pro-business government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New York. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.4%.

The powerhouse Bear Stearns economy, worth 516 trillion dollars a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Retail, Soda Sales, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 92,187 dollars, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 429,281 per year while the poor average 11,873, a ratio of 36.2 to 1.

Ethnic minorities are often refused admission to some of the nation's best schools, charity workers dole out hardtack from behind designer sunglasses, citizens receive notices of disenfranchisement along with their parking tickets, and Chief Executive Officer Jim Cayne sports gold-plated grillz to promote the government's hard money policy. Crime is a serious problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Bear Stearns's national animal is the bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Bear Stearns is ranked 210,778th in the world and 23rd in Elchland for Most Beautiful Environments, with 273.02 pounds of wildlife per square mile.

Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 3,101stLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3,708thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 5,226thLargest Gambling Industry: 5,264thFattest Citizens: 6,728thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,768thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 8,552ndLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 11,246thRudest Citizens: 11,566thTop
Largest Retail Industry: 14,266thMost Pro-Market: 21,290thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 22,180thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 24,688th
Largest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionTop
Highest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionMost Pro-Market: 2nd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Avoided: 3rd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3rd in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 3rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


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