by Max Barry

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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 45thLargest Information Technology Sector: 69thLargest Black Market: 84th
The Helpdesk of
Iron Fist Consumerists
I think, therefor I can build big guns to shoot you.
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population23.324 billion

LeaderBobo The Omniscient Chaos Overlord
FaithThe Holy haberdashery of Batman

CurrencyChocolate Chip Pancake
AnimalBig Bird

The Helpdesk of Avalnier is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Bobo The Omniscient Chaos Overlord with an iron fist, and notable for its zero percent divorce rate, parental licensing program, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 23.324 billion Avalnierians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fuzzybottom. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 85.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Avalnierian economy, worth an astonishing 14,479 trillion Chocolate Chip Pancakes a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 620,783 Chocolate Chip Pancakes, with the richest citizens earning 9.2 times as much as the poorest.

Even secular Avalnierians are shouting "Blessed are the cheesemakers!", the subway is dead quiet in early afternoons, children have lost interest in toy guns in favor of toy meth lab kits, and begun the Clone Wars have. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Avalnier's national animal is the Big Bird, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is The Holy haberdashery of Batman.

Avalnier is ranked 1,411th in the world and 54th in Lazarus for Most Developed, scoring 98.26 on the Human Development Index.

Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 45thLargest Information Technology Sector: 69thLargest Black Market: 84thMost Corrupt Governments: 137thHighest Average Incomes: 151stMost Scientifically Advanced: 163rdLargest Insurance Industry: 214thHighest Economic Output: 263rdLowest Crime Rates: 282ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 337thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 348thMost Secular: 362ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 451stLargest Mining Sector: 464thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 504thMost Efficient Economies: 577thMost Subsidized Industry: 773rdHighest Wealthy Incomes: 846thLargest Retail Industry: 846thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,279thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1,375thLargest Governments: 1,385thMost Developed: 1,411thSmartest Citizens: 1,445thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,649thMost Advanced Public Transport: 1,789thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,925thMost Patriotic: 2,025thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2,211thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2,218thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2,243rdMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,286thHighest Poor Incomes: 2,697thMost Stationary: 2,796thTop
Most Advanced Public Education: 3,256thLargest Gambling Industry: 4,812thRudest Citizens: 5,629thMost Beautiful Environments: 5,975thLargest Populations: 6,926thLargest Agricultural Sector: 7,170thMost Valuable International Artwork: 7,476thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,531stHealthiest Citizens: 8,732ndLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 9,983rdHighest Average Tax Rates: 12,040thMost Influential: 13,068thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 14,151stTop
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 15,968th
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 5th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 6th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 8th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 9th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 9th in the regionLargest Black Market: 9th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 11th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 11th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 13th in the regionMost Secular: 14th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 15th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 17th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 17th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 19th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 30th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 32nd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 37th in the regionMost Stationary: 46th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 47th in the regionMost Developed: 54th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 61st in the regionLargest Governments: 61st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 62nd in the regionMost Patriotic: 62nd in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 71st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 75th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 75th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 89th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 90th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 92nd in the regionTop
Highest Poor Incomes: 106th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 117th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 132nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 149th in the regionLargest Populations: 206th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 226th in the regionRudest Citizens: 285th in the regionMost Influential: 319th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 324th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 333rd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 359th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 362nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 471st in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 474th in the regionTop
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 616th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 699th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 839th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 957th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, begun the Clone Wars have.
  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, children have lost interest in toy guns in favor of toy meth lab kits.
  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, the subway is dead quiet in early afternoons.
  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, even secular Avalnierians are shouting "Blessed are the cheesemakers!".
  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, fine dining is just too fine for most of the populace.
  • : Avalnier was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Eco-Friendly Governments.
  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, in court almost every witness is a hostile witness.
  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, Fuzzybottom's main city thoroughfare has been blocked by a row of leyland cypresses that mysteriously appeared overnight.
  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, the government has declared its commitment to multilateralism.
  • : Following new legislation in Avalnier, sharks are enjoying their deliveries of canned food.