The Returning Tyrant of Auphelia is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by The Mother Watcher with a fair hand, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, soft-spoken computers, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 3.02 billion Auphelians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The medium-sized, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Virgo. The average income tax rate is 60.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Auphelian economy, worth 453 trillion Medical Expenseses a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 150,269 Medical Expenseses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The family summer vacation has become a thing of the past following the introduction of the year-round school year, debates on whether toilet seats should be left up or down are increasingly commonplace, any citizen who cries is immediately assigned a psychiatrist, and the government only invests in infrastructure after a natural disaster. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Auphelia's national animal is the Unicorn, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Auphelia is ranked 7,458^th in the world and 234^th in the South Pacific for Healthiest Citizens, with 15.27 Bananas Ingested Per Day.