The Empire of Athington is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Melissa Propila with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory vegetarianism, frequent executions, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 3.333 billion Athingtonians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hington. The average income tax rate is 68.4%.

The powerhouse Athingtonian economy, worth 263 trillion Athers a year, is quite specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Basket Weaving, and Information Technology. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 79,013 Athers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.4 times as much as the poorest.

Flatulent people are left to die of cancer at the end of hospital waiting lists, five-year-olds chanting "Little Miss Muffet" are accused of bullying arachnophobes, family trees become bare as entire branches are lopped off, and cane fights are a common sight in nursing homes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Athington's national animal is the Scorpion, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Athington is ranked 288,998^th in the world and 1^st in Athingtonian Empire for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -8.85 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.