The Kingdom of Ateenia is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Ena Kalinka with an iron fist, and remarkable for its compulsory military service, zero percent divorce rate, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 11.346 billion Ateenians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Administration, and Industry are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Atha. The average income tax rate is 72.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Ateenian economy, worth a remarkable 2,501 trillion Ateenian Crowns a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 220,501 Ateenian Crowns, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government takes agricultural advice from a wasp-themed superhero, customs officials often double as wedding officiants, there's nothing more rock-and-roll than absolute sobriety, and it's believed that women's brains will overheat if they think for themselves. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ateenia's national animal is the Polar Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Vjoldinism.

Ateenia is ranked 246,688^th in the world and 215^th in Eurth for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring -12.07 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.