The Eternal Misfortune of Askatopia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by The Executioner with an iron fist, and renowned for its smutty television, complete lack of prisons, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 20.152 billion Disposables are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order and Spirituality also on the agenda, while Education and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Unyielding Cesspit Of Filth. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Disposable economy, worth an astonishing 12,283 trillion Nuclear Bombs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, Basket Weaving, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 609,551 Nuclear Bombs, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

It isn't only obsequious grandees who produce a lot of manure at state occasions, military equipment stores have a tendency to go up in flames, twins move across the country to avoid being accused of the other's crimes, and truncheon-mounted cameras record the beating of criminals in dynamic HD detail. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Askatopia's national animal is the Slug, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Violetism.

Askatopia is ranked 7^th in the world and 1^st in Pencil Sharpeners Puppet Storage for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 46,404.84 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.