The Commonwealth Realm of Ascoobis is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Prime Minister Harold Black with an even hand, and notable for its otherworldly petting zoo, smutty television, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The compassionate, humorless population of 14.69 billion Ascoobians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Darkmount. The average income tax rate is 99.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Ascoobian economy, worth a remarkable 3,544 trillion Credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is an amazing 241,306 Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Large-girthed charity workers assign themselves healthy wages for their work with starving children, politicians are often found scavenging bins at night to supplement their income, only clowns with PhDs from clown college can advise Prime Minister Harold Black on Ascoobis's coulrophobia epidemic, and Ascoobian watches list strained wrists as a common side effect. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ascoobis's national animal is the Golden Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Secularism.

Ascoobis is ranked 1,402^nd in the world and 2^nd in The Coalition of Democratic Nations for Most Secular, with 99.09 Atheism Rate.