by Max Barry

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Largest Gambling Industry: 245th Largest Soda Pop Sector: 295th Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 362nd
The Free Merchant Archipelago of
E Mare Libertas
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Deck


Population8.236 billion

CapitalPort Ascension
LeaderMerchant Governor Sir Charles Arkwright

CurrencyGold Aschenburg Crown
AnimalAschenburgarian Sailfish

The Free Merchant Archipelago of Aschenburg is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Merchant Governor Sir Charles Arkwright with an even hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, barren, inhospitable landscape, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 8.236 billion Aschenburgarians enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is effectively ruled by the Department of Industry, although Education and Defense are also considered important, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Port Ascension. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Aschenburgian economy, worth a remarkable 2,514 trillion Gold Aschenburg Crowns a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Information Technology, and Soda Sales. Average income is an amazing 305,317 Gold Aschenburg Crowns, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,702,144 per year while the poor average 27,341, a ratio of 62.3 to 1.

A paperwork error has naval privateers being directed to attack land-locked nations, if foreigners can hit a spittoon from five paces they get a free holiday to Aschenburg, toy versions of heroin paraphernalia let kids pretend to be their favourite TV characters, and the government's new priority is citizens' access to cat videos. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Aschenburg's national animal is the Aschenburgarian Sailfish, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Aschenburg is ranked 168,397th in the world and 7,340th in the South Pacific for Safest, scoring 2.57 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.

Largest Gambling Industry: 245thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 295thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 362ndLargest Retail Industry: 382ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 421stHighest Crime Rates: 422ndMost Armed: 439thFattest Citizens: 456thRudest Citizens: 463rdLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 566thHighest Disposable Incomes: 593rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 651stMost World Assembly Endorsements: 857thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 869thMost Avoided: 899thLargest Insurance Industry: 957thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,076thMost Influential: 1,115thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,327thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,411thHighest Average Incomes: 1,414thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,588thMost Rebellious Youth: 1,631stTop
Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 1,943rdLargest Mining Sector: 2,042ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,194thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2,927thMost Efficient Economies: 3,552ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 3,592ndHighest Economic Output: 4,017thLargest Publishing Industry: 4,287thHighest Drug Use: 6,197thMost Cultured: 6,220thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 7,431stLargest Information Technology Sector: 7,480thMost Pro-Market: 7,599thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 7,914thTop
Smartest Citizens: 8,754thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 10,388thLargest Black Market: 12,541st
Largest Gambling Industry: 6th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 6th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 9th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 9th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 10th in the regionMost Armed: 12th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 13th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 14th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 15th in the regionFattest Citizens: 15th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 17th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 18th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 19th in the regionMost Avoided: 20th in the regionRudest Citizens: 20th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 21st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 25th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 27th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 29th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 31st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 32nd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 35th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 38th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 54th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 56th in the regionMost Influential: 56th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 66th in the regionTop
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 77th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 101st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 117th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 122nd in the regionHighest Drug Use: 125th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 152nd in the regionMost Cultured: 187th in the regionLargest Black Market: 188th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 240th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 245th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 245th in the regionLargest Populations: 259th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 260th in the regionTop
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 398th in the regionMost Stationary: 434th in the regionNudest: 465th in the regionMost Secular: 709th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Aschenburg was endorsed by The Republic of Zenopolist.
  • : Aschenburg was endorsed by The Constitutional Monarchy of Silberne Wache.
  • : Aschenburg voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Condemn the Pacific".
  • : Following new legislation in Aschenburg, the government's new priority is citizens' access to cat videos.
  • : Following new legislation in Aschenburg, toy versions of heroin paraphernalia let kids pretend to be their favourite TV characters.
  • : Following new legislation in Aschenburg, if foreigners can hit a spittoon from five paces they get a free holiday to Aschenburg.
  • : Following new legislation in Aschenburg, a paperwork error has naval privateers being directed to attack land-locked nations.
  • : Aschenburg endorsed The Theocracy of Cardinal Copia.
  • : Following new legislation in Aschenburg, the Aschenburgian Tourism Bureau has described the abolition of coastal defences as a "kick to the groyne".
  • : Following new legislation in Aschenburg, Aschenburgarian Sailfish is one of the most popular forenames in Aschenburg.


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 146 » Luddinlande, Pencil Sharpeners 2, Bear Connors Paradiso, Farengeto, Kiasu-ism, Kaugummi, Tsunamy, Three Rivia Levr, The Bloodguard, Kringalia, Darakin, Qazahnir, The Two Jerseys, Outer Utonixick Gollinican, The United Expanse, Transtemporal Shifts, FreeFishers, Curlyhoward, Quiescent, Soem, Bergenu, Seliyan progressive Islands, Theorin, Lioniel, Gymnostan, Phillius, Madhonia, Japanese Federal Republic, Dankstergrad, Dubbayoo, Ancient Slobovia, GI-Land, Nyfinest128, Kholdan, Sedunn, The Solar System Scope, Ufask, Crabius, Tyflugian, Qvait, Saganye, Pax Dracon, Pamela And Hepatitis, Nothanksbutseriously, Ukronda, Lambdaland, Drystar, Vlod, Tau Xen, Techganet, and 96 others.Nettunia, The Eight Hearths, Erinor, Abarri, Cypheri, Sagada, Bonaugure, WTP All the good names are taken, Dylar, Auphelia, Noire Denholm, Center Lisle, Antarctic Empires, Oxsania, Moreana, Nova Montron, Great Vritannia, UnitedStatesofMrloong, Si-topia, The Black Cats, Centristvill, Premier Knowhere, Concrete Slab, Noveos, Anachronolandia, Ratioprudentia, Nowa Europa, Fiorina Furya, Jehenna, Yellunstryer, Wynburg, Aidenfieeld, Bawkie, Native Inhabitants of Antarctica, Hanskarr, Farelonia, Tsvetania, Hanguk-Nippon, Rebel-topia, United Stanstans, Sandaoguo, Aywhyou, Khazadine, Wyatonians, Vincent Field, Westoc Kinness, Janapuri, Linguiniland, The naked people, Sween-flu Quarantine Zone, Sonnydesh, The Sakhalinsk Empire, Idiopola, Nankyoku Tairiku, Pastir, La Ascension, United States of Vietnam, Escevola, BarnicleLand, Volaworand, Paranoia, Pelland, 073 039 109 032 080 111 112 112 121, Catalunya unida, Holleervag Islacotil, Rhetiaa, Fighting Kawi Ninja, Gebirgig Pfingstemeinde Land, Miesce, Saciu, Nudnoji, Oskyelion, New Briantown, Lunadae, Calistan, Jaxon, East Lodge, Midand, Puerto Madryn, Hasilberg, Absolute Austerity, Complete Conformity, Great Andora, East Sakhlin, Islas Tualua, Atomic Garden, Mona Landia, North Kanuckistan, Capitalistic Pig, Aumeltopia, Beepee, The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp, Elveka, UnShleepd, Silberne Wache, and Zenopolist.

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