Population | 13.764 billion |
Capital | Artemis City |
Leader | The Happy Man |
Faith | Happiness |
Currency | artem |
Animal | platypus |
The Free and Happy Republic of Artemizistan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by The Happy Man with an iron fist, and notable for its smutty television, rampant corporate plagiarism, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 13.764 billion Artemizistanis are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.
The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Artemis City. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.
The frighteningly efficient Artemizistani economy, worth a remarkable 4,322 trillion artems a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Tourism, Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 314,031 artems, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.
Every week is blindness awareness week, tourists visit Artemizistan to mass-moon Artemizistani politicians, escaped birthday balloons are torpedoed out of the sky, and small shoes often wash up on the beach. Crime is totally unknown. Artemizistan's national animal is the platypus, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Happiness.
Artemizistan is ranked 3,917th in the world and 1st in The Chuckle Playground of Fun and Games for Most Cultured, scoring 190 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, small shoes often wash up on the beach.
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, escaped birthday balloons are torpedoed out of the sky.
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, tourists visit Artemizistan to mass-moon Artemizistani politicians.
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, every week is blindness awareness week.
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, sometimes a single pallbearer is all you need.
- : Artemizistan was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Extensive Public Healthcare.
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, the derisively named "Morlocks of Moria" futilely demand time in the sun.
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, abortions are routinely performed in the nation's hospitals.
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, engine room hooch is the drink of choice among the nation's navy.
- : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, popular cartoon characters frequently appear in government-sponsored PSAs reminding students to say no to drugs.