by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Public Transport: 957thLargest Black Market: 1,100thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,440th
The Free and Happy Republic of
Corrupt Dictatorship
Peace and happiness for all!
Influence
Eminence Grise
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Artemizistan

Population13.764 billion

CapitalArtemis City
LeaderThe Happy Man
FaithHappiness

Currencyartem
Animalplatypus

The Free and Happy Republic of Artemizistan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by The Happy Man with an iron fist, and notable for its smutty television, rampant corporate plagiarism, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 13.764 billion Artemizistanis are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Artemis City. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Artemizistani economy, worth a remarkable 4,322 trillion artems a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Tourism, Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 314,031 artems, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Every week is blindness awareness week, tourists visit Artemizistan to mass-moon Artemizistani politicians, escaped birthday balloons are torpedoed out of the sky, and small shoes often wash up on the beach. Crime is totally unknown. Artemizistan's national animal is the platypus, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Happiness.

Artemizistan is ranked 3,917th in the world and 1st in The Chuckle Playground of Fun and Games for Most Cultured, scoring 190 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.

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Most Advanced Public Transport: 957thLargest Black Market: 1,100thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,440thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,444thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,479thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 1,560thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,709thMost Advanced Public Education: 1,929thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2,220thHighest Average Incomes: 2,490thHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,831stMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2,965thTop
5%
Largest Governments: 3,080thMost Beautiful Environments: 3,376thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 3,650thMost Cultured: 3,917thHighest Economic Output: 4,193rdMost Developed: 4,442ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 4,613thMost Corrupt Governments: 5,057thHighest Food Quality: 5,421stMost Scientifically Advanced: 5,474thMost Efficient Economies: 5,990thSmartest Citizens: 6,318thLongest Average Lifespans: 6,457thLargest Publishing Industry: 7,138thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 7,434thMost Inclusive: 7,515thLowest Crime Rates: 7,596thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 8,206thBest Weather: 8,952ndMost Secular: 10,761stMost Patriotic: 13,894thMost Valuable International Artwork: 14,321stTop
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Highest Wealthy Incomes: 15,796thMost Rebellious Youth: 17,197thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 17,563rdMost Influential: 17,950thMost Stationary: 22,415thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 23,631stHealthiest Citizens: 26,563rdLargest Agricultural Sector: 26,604thLargest Populations: 29,623rd
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Most Inclusive: 1st in the regionMost Developed: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionLargest Populations: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1st in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 1st in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Influential: 1st in the regionSmartest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 1st in the regionHighest Food Quality: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 1st in the regionMost Cultured: 1st in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 1st in the regionBest Weather: 1st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 1st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, small shoes often wash up on the beach.
  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, escaped birthday balloons are torpedoed out of the sky.
  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, tourists visit Artemizistan to mass-moon Artemizistani politicians.
  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, every week is blindness awareness week.
  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, sometimes a single pallbearer is all you need.
  • : Artemizistan was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Extensive Public Healthcare.
  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, the derisively named "Morlocks of Moria" futilely demand time in the sun.
  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, abortions are routinely performed in the nation's hospitals.
  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, engine room hooch is the drink of choice among the nation's navy.
  • : Following new legislation in Artemizistan, popular cartoon characters frequently appear in government-sponsored PSAs reminding students to say no to drugs.

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