The Commonwealth of Artelesia is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Artela with an even hand, and renowned for its smutty television, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate population of 1.301 billion Artelesians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Artelesium. The average income tax rate is 75.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Artelesian economy, worth 128 trillion Artelan Groats a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Trout Farming, and Cheese Exports. Average income is 99,034 Artelan Groats, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Farmers have taken to hunting billionaires who encroach on their land, one does not simply walk into the tundra, teenagers performing appendectomies on their friends has become a popular schoolyard prank, and election ballot papers are so long that unused ones are recycled as toilet roll. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Artelesia's national animal is the Dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Atheism.

Artelesia is ranked 249,996^th in the world and 13,060^th in The North Pacific for Highest Crime Rates, with 1.92 crimes per hour.