The Empire of Aroni is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Alfrid Wagner with an even hand, and renowned for its smutty television, ban on automobiles, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 7.206 billion Aronians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Guzbek. The average income tax rate is 7.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Aronian economy, worth a remarkable 2,288 trillion Aronian Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 317,630 Aronian Pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Tower block residents are each held responsible for four square inches of front lawn, polygraphs are relegated to the dungeon exhibit in castle museums, the military refers to helpless combatants offering surrender as "sitting ducks", and 4-year-olds studying for their mathematics exams are anxious that they will be unemployable in adulthood if they fail. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Aroni's national animal is the Aronian Condor, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Aroni is ranked 1,227^th in the world and 50^th in Osiris for Lowest Crime Rates, with 150.42 Law-abiding Acts Per Hour.