The Holy Empire of An Clar is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Gaius Melkor with an iron fist, and remarkable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, national health service, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 28.881 billion Clarians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Education, and Healthcare are also considered important, while International Aid is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Inis. The income tax rate is 100%.

The enormous but inefficient Clarian economy, worth a remarkable 4,530 trillion banner yoyoes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Information Technology. Average income is an impressive 156,857 banner yoyoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Referenda are banned by law and the Parliament has absolute control of the legislative process, the government is pouring money into 'Operation Enduring Democracy', both criminals and civilians are DOA, and enemy agents are generally eliminated with extreme prejudice. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. An Clar's national animal is the magpie, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Melkorianism.

An Clar is ranked 37,934^th in the world and 498^th in Europe for Healthiest Citizens, with 5.87 Bananas Ingested Per Day.