by Max Barry

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Most Compassionate Citizens: 115th Least Corrupt Governments: 130th Nicest Citizens: 140th
The Imperial Protectorates of
Democratic Socialists
Only the honor of a Paladin is unbreakable
Influence
Eminence Grise
Civil Rights
Good
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Very Good

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend

Altruistic Paladins

Population14.639 billion

CapitalMount Celestia
LeaderEmperor Norton II

CurrencyLicet
Animalcanid

The Imperial Protectorates of Altruistic Paladins is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Emperor Norton II with an even hand, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, restrictive gun laws, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 14.639 billion Altruistic Paladins are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government prioritizes Education, with Social Policy, Defense, and Environment also on the agenda, while Spirituality is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mount Celestia. The average income tax rate is 98.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Paladin economy, worth a remarkable 3,268 trillion Licets a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing and Information Technology. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 223,275 Licets, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Peace talks occasionally rack up a higher body count than the wars they seek to stop, from the highest mountain to the deepest cave - one can always count on finding a good cell signal in Altruistic Paladins, cricket farmers use magnifying glasses to fit every member of their herd with tiny tracking tags, and liberals and conservatives try to disqualify each other's candidates on the grounds that "their ideas would never work in the real world". Crime is totally unknown. Altruistic Paladins's national animal is the canid, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Altruistic Paladins is ranked 69,487th in the world and 273rd in Democratic Socialist Assembly for Most Extensive Civil Rights, with 63.14 Martin Luther King, Jr. Units.

Top
1%
Most Compassionate Citizens: 115thLeast Corrupt Governments: 130thNicest Citizens: 140thMost Influential: 161stMost Advanced Public Education: 234thMost Cultured: 243rdSmartest Citizens: 342ndSafest: 381stMost Pacifist: 455thMost Cheerful Citizens: 580thLargest Publishing Industry: 582ndMost Efficient Economies: 869thMost Developed: 878thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 948thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,000thMost Inclusive: 1,065thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,100thLowest Crime Rates: 1,250thMost Rebellious Youth: 1,257thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,318thLargest Governments: 1,370thHealthiest Citizens: 1,420thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,676thTop
5%
Highest Economic Output: 2,339thMost Beautiful Environments: 3,076thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3,500thHighest Average Incomes: 3,552ndLargest Welfare Programs: 4,074thMost Advanced Public Transport: 4,306thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4,485thLargest Information Technology Sector: 5,438thMost Secular: 7,137thLargest Populations: 7,381st
Top
1%
Most Scientifically Advanced: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionMost Influential: 1st in the regionNicest Citizens: 2nd in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 2nd in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Cultured: 2nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 3rd in the regionTop
5%
Highest Average Incomes: 4th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 5th in the regionSafest: 5th in the regionMost Pacifist: 7th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 8th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 8th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 9th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 9th in the regionLargest Governments: 10th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 10th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 10th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 10th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 11th in the regionMost Developed: 13th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 13th in the regionMost Inclusive: 14th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 15th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 15th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Populations: 17th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 19th in the regionMost Secular: 19th in the regionMost Average: 28th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 32nd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Altruistic Paladins, liberals and conservatives try to disqualify each other's candidates on the grounds that "their ideas would never work in the real world".
  • : Following new legislation in Altruistic Paladins, cricket farmers use magnifying glasses to fit every member of their herd with tiny tracking tags.
  • : Following new legislation in Altruistic Paladins, from the highest mountain to the deepest cave - one can always count on finding a good cell signal in Altruistic Paladins.
  • : Altruistic Paladins's influence in Democratic Socialist Assembly rose from "Sprat" to "Eminence Grise".
  • : Altruistic Paladins altered its national flag.
  • : Following new legislation in Altruistic Paladins, peace talks occasionally rack up a higher body count than the wars they seek to stop.
  • : Following new legislation in Altruistic Paladins, statues of famous citizens are erected or demolished on a purely partisan basis.
  • : Following new legislation in Altruistic Paladins, it takes months to get the proper permits for a child's first tricycle.
  • : Altruistic Paladins was reclassified from "Inoffensive Centrist Democracy" to "Democratic Socialists".
  • : Altruistic Paladins relocated from Lazarus to Democratic Socialist Assembly.

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