The Jingoistic States of Alte Preussen is a large, orderly nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, irreverence towards religion, and complete absence of social welfare. The cynical population of 79 million Alte Preussenians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Education, and Administration also on the agenda, while International Aid and Spirituality are ignored. The average income tax rate is 23.9%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but underdeveloped Alte Preussenian economy, worth 2.83 trillion Marks a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Retail, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 35,849 Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Wigged-out hunters report playing croquet with the Queen of Hearts, gambling is outlawed, political parties are banned from advertising and receiving private donations, and the mentally ill are given high powered automatic weapons for "catharsis therapy". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Alte Preussen's national animal is the Black Eagle, which can occasionally be seen dodging aircraft in the nation's cities.

Alte Preussen is ranked 125,678^th in the world and 124^th in Hell for Highest Poor Incomes, with 25,932.88 Standard Monetary Units.