by Max Barry

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Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 329th Most Efficient Economies: 362nd Largest Black Market: 401st
The National Falangist Kingdom of
Iron Fist Consumerists
In Hoc Signo Vinces
Regional Influence
Nipper
Region
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Factbook Dispatches People Government Economy Rank Trend

The National Falangist Kingdom of All Communist China is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by King George VII Gregory Qing with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rampant corporate plagiarism, frequent executions, and ban on automobiles. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 15.468 billion Chinese are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order and Industry are also considered important, while Social Policy and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Xian. The average income tax rate is 44.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Sino economy, worth a remarkable 4,968 trillion Royal Yuan a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, Uranium Mining, and Soda Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 321,239 Royal Yuan, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

Taking hostages is a great way to influence government policy, boys who even ask about cheerleading are placed on the Sex Offenders Register, libraries are refusing to stock A Midsummer Night's Dream because it has an ass in it, and earthquake sirens are a leading cause of hearing loss. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. All Communist China's national animal is the Panda, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

All Communist China is ranked 145,955th in the world and 4,534th in Lazarus for Highest Crime Rates, with 1.64 Crimes Per Hour.

Top
1%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 329thMost Efficient Economies: 362ndLargest Black Market: 401stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 522ndLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 613thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 729thLargest Insurance Industry: 757thHighest Average Incomes: 922ndLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 932ndMost Primitive: 980thHighest Economic Output: 1,045thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,128thMost Devout: 1,234thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,277thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,297thLargest Mining Sector: 1,386thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,430thTop
5%
Most Avoided: 1,565thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,745thFattest Citizens: 1,891stMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,972ndLargest Retail Industry: 2,004thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2,040thMost Subsidized Industry: 2,167thLargest Publishing Industry: 2,289thLargest Gambling Industry: 2,636thLargest Agricultural Sector: 2,847thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3,956thLargest Governments: 4,798thMost Cultured: 5,297thLowest Crime Rates: 5,360thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 5,394thLargest Populations: 6,177thTop
10%
Most Conservative: 7,650thMost Authoritarian: 9,030th
Top
1%
Most Efficient Economies: 12th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 15th in the regionLargest Black Market: 17th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 20th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 30th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 30th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 33rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 39th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 41st in the regionMost Primitive: 45th in the regionMost Devout: 45th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 46th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 47th in the regionTop
5%
Highest Economic Output: 48th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 54th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 61st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 64th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 67th in the regionMost Avoided: 75th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 78th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 79th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 80th in the regionFattest Citizens: 89th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 99th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 101st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 123rd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 135th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 195th in the regionLargest Governments: 206th in the regionLargest Populations: 222nd in the regionMost Cultured: 226th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 232nd in the regionTop
10%
Lowest Crime Rates: 248th in the regionMost Conservative: 250th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 270th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 436th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : All Communist China's influence in Lazarus rose from "Newcomer" to "Nipper".
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, earthquake sirens are a leading cause of hearing loss.
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, libraries are refusing to stock A Midsummer Night's Dream because it has an ass in it.
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, boys who even ask about cheerleading are placed on the Sex Offenders Register.
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, taking hostages is a great way to influence government policy.
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, cash-strapped junkies lick rabbits for a cheap high.
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, the government is cracking down on subversive groups.
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, all writing must pass a censorship board before being allowed on the shelves.
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, court verdicts are predictable to within a hundredth of a percentage point.
  • : Following new legislation in All Communist China, any body part that can be cut off a person is no longer considered to be their property.

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