The Empire of Aikoland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Prime Minister Mélodie Bélanger with a fair hand, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, national health service, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless, devout population of 14.188 billion Aikolandais are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The minute, corrupt, outspoken government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, although Education, Administration, and Defense are also considered important, while Welfare and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ville d'Aiko. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Aikolandais economy, worth a remarkable 4,017 trillion Aikolandais francs a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 283,162 Aikolandais francs, with the richest citizens earning 7.4 times as much as the poorest.

Former customs officers are adjusting to their new lives as market stall traders, the government has implemented minimum wage laws, the masses are surrendering their civil liberties without complaint for the sake of shopping convenience, and town welcome signs list corporate sponsors. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Aikoland's national animal is the Aikolandais crested eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Aikoland is ranked 114,515^th in the world and 18^th in Osakaland for Nudest, with 77 Cheeks Per Square Mile.