The Phantasm of Afi-Aftos is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by El Guapo with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, lack of airports, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 35.302 billion Afi-Aftosians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt government is dominated by the Department of Industry, although Healthcare and Administration are also considered important, while Social Policy and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dreck City. The average income tax rate is 62.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Afi-Aftosian economy, worth a remarkable 6,656 trillion Fishterous Correlations a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Uranium Mining, Gambling, Retail, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is an impressive 188,551 Fishterous Correlations, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Pausing for applause during a speech is seen as a form of censorship, alcoholism is the newest import from Dàguó, the richest individuals apparently buy nothing but noodles and toilet paper, and hospitals in Afi-Aftos are too busy serving the needs of Fredonia to see Afi-Aftosians. Crime is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Afi-Aftos's national animal is the Vermicious Knid, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Dudeism.

Afi-Aftos is ranked 170,420^th in the world and 1^st in Fredonia for Most Inclusive, scoring 6.05 on the Mandela-Wollstonecraft Non-Discrimination Index.