The Five Thousands of Acqui Division is a gargantuan, safe nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 13.817 billion Acqui Divisionians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Spirituality, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 57.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Acqui Divisionian economy, worth 434 trillion francolinos a year, is quite specialized and led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Basket Weaving, and Pizza Delivery. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 31,445 francolinos, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Acqui Division's national animal is the guerrilla fighter, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Acqui Division is ranked 136,473^rd in the world and 1,436^th in Artificial Solar System for Lowest Crime Rates, with 62.13 law-abiding acts per hour.