by Max Barry

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Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 4,123rdLargest Agricultural Sector: 4,926thHealthiest Citizens: 5,060th
The Turtlezogian Cult of
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population5.736 billion



The Turtlezogian Cult of Abbots is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by IDK with an even hand, and remarkable for its compulsory military service, sprawling nuclear power plants, and keen interest in outer space. The compassionate population of 5.736 billion Abbotsians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Abbotsford. The average income tax rate is 91.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Abbotsian economy, worth 865 trillion Waffleses a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 150,900 Waffleses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

People make a career out of medical voyeurism, CEOs can't hear the term 'Fire Sale' without bursting into tears, 100-year-old politicians are now a thing of the past, and crime suspects are forced to submit to blood testing. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Abbots's national animal is the bat, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is turtlezogoth.

Abbots is ranked 13,639th in the world and 9th in Lorania for Most Advanced Public Transport, scoring 2,806.09 on the Societal Mobility Rating.

Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 4,123rdLargest Agricultural Sector: 4,926thHealthiest Citizens: 5,060thBest Weather: 5,151stLowest Crime Rates: 5,366thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 5,483rdLongest Average Lifespans: 5,950thMost Beautiful Environments: 6,050thMost Developed: 6,373rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 6,569thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 7,626thRudest Citizens: 7,668thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 7,904thLargest Governments: 7,960thHighest Average Tax Rates: 7,976thMost Cultured: 8,063rdMost Cheerful Citizens: 8,579thMost Efficient Economies: 9,582ndNicest Citizens: 9,635thMost Advanced Public Education: 9,846thHighest Poor Incomes: 9,916thMost Compassionate Citizens: 10,066thSmartest Citizens: 10,655thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 10,721stSafest: 11,541stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 12,024thTop
Most Inclusive: 12,202ndMost Valuable International Artwork: 12,700thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 12,806thMost Subsidized Industry: 13,273rdMost Advanced Public Transport: 13,639thHighest Average Incomes: 13,807thMost Secular: 15,266thLargest Publishing Industry: 16,194thHighest Economic Output: 21,089th
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2nd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 2nd in the regionTop
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 3rd in the regionMost Developed: 4th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4th in the region

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