by Max Barry

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Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 28th Largest Cheese Export Sector: 63rd Largest Insurance Industry: 243rd
The Kingslayer of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Always fighting crime -- especially youth-related.
Influence
Powerbroker
Region
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

A mean old man

Population21.118 billion

Capitalthe world
Leadera tired and angry old fart
Faithforgotten

Currencycolostomy bag
Animalreally old cat

The Kingslayer of A mean old man is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by a tired and angry old fart with an iron fist, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, ubiquitous missile silos, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 21.118 billion Floridians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, although Industry is also considered important, while Social Policy and Education are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the world. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient old as hell economy, worth a remarkable 7,369 trillion colostomy bags a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an amazing 348,973 colostomy bags, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,257,431 per year while the poor average 69,254, a ratio of 18.2 to 1.

Maintaining economic growth is no laughing matter, petitioners are increasingly resorting to climbing through a tired and angry old fart's window to draw attention to their issues, politicians' financial records are locked up tighter than the nation's colostomy bag reserves, and Merry Birthday is a popular protest song despite the risk of fines and royalty dues. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. A mean old man's national animal is the really old cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is forgotten.

A mean old man is ranked 649th in the world and 1st in Lytic for Highest Economic Output, with 7,369 trillion Standard Monetary Units.

Top
1%
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 28thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 63rdLargest Insurance Industry: 243rdLargest Agricultural Sector: 246thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 263rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 355thMost Corrupt Governments: 593rdHighest Economic Output: 649thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 656thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 656thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 741stHighest Average Incomes: 913thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 957thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 976thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,228thTop
5%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 1,651stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,872ndLargest Black Market: 2,061stLowest Crime Rates: 2,134thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,371stLargest Mining Sector: 2,425thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2,921stMost Beautiful Environments: 4,096thLargest Populations: 4,448thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4,897thLargest Governments: 6,768thFattest Citizens: 6,866thBest Weather: 7,181stMost Secular: 7,224thTop
10%
Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 8,693rdHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 13,531stHighest Drug Use: 13,664thMost Efficient Economies: 13,875thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 15,969th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : A mean old man was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Ignorant Citizens.
  • : A mean old man was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Greatest Rich-Poor Divides.
  • : A mean old man's influence in Lytic rose from "Eminence Grise" to "Powerbroker".
  • : A mean old man was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Popular Tourist Destinations.
  • : A mean old man was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Ignorant Citizens.
  • : A mean old man was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector.
  • : A mean old man's influence in Lytic rose from "Enforcer" to "Eminence Grise".
  • : A mean old man's influence in Lytic rose from "Dealmaker" to "Enforcer".
  • : A mean old man was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Ignorant Citizens.
  • : A mean old man's influence in Lytic rose from "Instigator" to "Dealmaker".

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