by Max Barry

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Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 27thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 113thLargest Insurance Industry: 213th
The Weed-choked lawn of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Always fighting crime -- especially youth-related.
Influence
Page
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

A mean old man

Population23.114 billion

Capitalthe world
Leadera tired and angry old fart
Faithforgotten

Currencycolostomy bag
Animalreally old cat

The Weed-choked lawn of A mean old man is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by a tired and angry old fart with an iron fist, and notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, sprawling nuclear power plants, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 23.114 billion geriatrics are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, although Industry is also considered important, while Social Policy and Education are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the world. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient old as hell economy, worth a remarkable 7,987 trillion colostomy bags a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Automobile Manufacturing. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 345,574 colostomy bags, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,894,994 per year while the poor average 32,093, a ratio of 59.0 to 1.

Maintaining economic growth is no laughing matter, petitioners are increasingly resorting to climbing through a tired and angry old fart's window to draw attention to their issues, politicians' financial records are locked up tighter than the nation's colostomy bag reserves, and Merry Birthday is a popular protest song despite the risk of fines and royalty dues. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. A mean old man's national animal is the really old cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is forgotten.

A mean old man is ranked 6,903rd in the world and 166th in The East Pacific for Largest Governments, scoring 36.46 on the Bureaucratic Comprehensiveness Rating Scale Index.

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1%
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 27thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 113thLargest Insurance Industry: 213thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 233rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 417thLargest Agricultural Sector: 556thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 604thHighest Economic Output: 676thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 679thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 704thMost Corrupt Governments: 711thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,023rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,232ndHighest Average Incomes: 1,233rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,279thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 2,004thTop
5%
Lowest Crime Rates: 2,327thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,419thMost Ignorant Citizens: 2,455thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,486thLargest Mining Sector: 2,681stLargest Black Market: 2,893rdMost Influential: 3,039thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3,310thMost Beautiful Environments: 3,822ndLargest Populations: 4,268thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 5,393rdFattest Citizens: 5,747thBest Weather: 6,437thLargest Governments: 6,903rdMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 8,183rdMost Secular: 8,421stTop
10%
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 14,198thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 14,947thMost Efficient Economies: 14,997thMost Scientifically Advanced: 19,047thLargest Information Technology Sector: 19,968thHighest Drug Use: 20,704th
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Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 4th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 5th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 6th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 7th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 9th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 9th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 12th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 12th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 21st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 26th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 30th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 31st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 31st in the regionLargest Populations: 34th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 38th in the regionLargest Black Market: 52nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 55th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 57th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 60th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 94th in the regionTop
5%
Most Beautiful Environments: 121st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 126th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 129th in the regionFattest Citizens: 138th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 152nd in the regionLargest Governments: 166th in the regionMost Influential: 175th in the regionBest Weather: 188th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 242nd in the regionMost Secular: 310th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 367th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 395th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 406th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 519th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 561st in the regionTop
10%
Highest Drug Use: 628th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 759th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 767th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 789th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 927th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1,097th in the regionMost Developed: 1,105th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1,117th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1,160th in the region

National Happenings

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 119 » Brotherland, Evrigenis, Todd McCloud, East Malaysia, La xinga, Marrabuk, Dragons Blood, Tuvaltastan, Acronis, Plazland, Pakitsk, Kelssek, Barfleur, Habsburg-Lorriane, Arkantis, Interdimensional Waifus, ReeK, Morrowine, Headpat Central, FreedomIand, VW53Aland, Iodinia, Enlil, CheeseBurrito, Servants of Gizmo, Endertopias, Freedomindia, Shavara, Dragonia, North Insomnia, New Bradenia Ghost, Puckconnolly, Seri Tai Republic, Taurora, Stumptopia, Amjedia, A Slanted Black Stripe, Brethren, Monteconstance, Kangarawa, Squarist Republic of Squaria, Unger under over, Abadong, H-Zhena, Eagas, Federated States of Zootron, Kario and Nix, AngusEssa, NewBorns333, The United Neo American Union, and 69 others.Zukchiva, Wanabe, Nifalembria Zamingstan, Survivoristan, Blobbo, Goodnamesarerare, Abtracnt, Molokiniki, 3 14159265358979323846264, The island of Kiria, Edmontia, Libertanny, HinduRashtr, Slonful, Bharatewa, Merlovich, Modra, Zang0, Squid Ruinosa, Authoritaria-Imperia, Vultuca, Wiranath, Talitoa, Aussiestan, Tretrid, Asendavia, Staynes, Distro-Spartica, The Big Brain Boys, Axdel, Lingu, Greater New Cassandra, Azureano, White Wolvengrad, Raunch, Bachtendekuppen, The American Free States, Of Centralist Brexit, Coruh, Moszce-Walvard, Amabilis, Technocratic Tagalog, New Leganes, Scostien, Alexandistan, Ripsylvania, I-America-I, Goral, Belora Gyles, Virgoliaendorses, The Three States of Fortuna, One Green Nation, Peoples Republic of GG, Khadah, Yossito II, RealDealGG1, ParaSymmetry, Aivintis, Rage Mage, Vaskeden, Oofery, Woodsind, Tseriesiscoming, Meagharia, Mays Austrian Nation, The Earth Systems Alliance, The Outremer VII, Sokala, and Feu de Glace.

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