by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Defense Forces: 267thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 443rdLargest Black Market: 473rd
The Adorableness of
Psychotic Dictatorship
۞ *squeak squeak* Muy frío! ۞
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

A Cluster Of Cute Hispanic Girls

Population18.029 billion

CapitalEl Salvador
LeaderAlpha Hispanic Girl Zulma Barrientos
FaithAdorable Squeakyness


The Adorableness of A Cluster Of Cute Hispanic Girls is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Alpha Hispanic Girl Zulma Barrientos with an iron fist, and notable for its disturbing lack of elderly people, free-roaming dinosaurs, and ban on automobiles. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 18.029 billion puffy Hispanic girls are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized morass — is primarily concerned with Defense, although Education, Industry, and Environment are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of El Salvador. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Cluster Of Cute Hispanic Girlsian economy, worth a remarkable 3,962 trillion Papayas a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, extremely specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing and Information Technology. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is an amazing 219,804 Papayas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Ice-filled coffins are ominously positioned in the corner of every hospital ward, citizens are grown in vats, protestors are soaking piles of Papayas in blood to make a point about government incomes, and a baby's first breath is also a baby's first felony. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. A Cluster Of Cute Hispanic Girls's national animal is the Chupacabra, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Adorable Squeakyness.

A Cluster Of Cute Hispanic Girls is ranked 1,782nd in the world and 7th in Texas for Lowest Crime Rates, with 138.62 law-abiding acts per hour.

Most Advanced Defense Forces: 267thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 443rdLargest Black Market: 473rdMost Devout: 660thMost Advanced Public Transport: 782ndMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 882ndMost Subsidized Industry: 1,115thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,210thLargest Welfare Programs: 1,764thLowest Crime Rates: 1,782ndMost Corrupt Governments: 1,878thMost Advanced Public Education: 2,187thTop
Highest Poor Incomes: 2,458thHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,515thHighest Economic Output: 3,310thMost Patriotic: 3,654thLargest Governments: 3,842ndBest Weather: 4,571stMost Beautiful Environments: 4,990thHighest Average Incomes: 5,295thHealthiest Citizens: 5,852ndMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 6,968thLargest Populations: 11,771stTop
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 12,213thMost Efficient Economies: 14,022ndMost Valuable International Artwork: 14,859thLargest Information Technology Sector: 19,418thMost Scientifically Advanced: 19,979thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 19,985thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 20,251stMost Authoritarian: 20,660thMost Inclusive: 23,477th
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 3rd in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 5th in the regionMost Devout: 5th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 6th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 7th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 7th in the regionMost Patriotic: 7th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 8th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 8th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 8th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 8th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 8th in the regionLargest Governments: 9th in the regionTop
Most Income Equality: 13th in the regionBest Weather: 14th in the regionMost Conservative: 15th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 16th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 16th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 17th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


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