by Max Barry

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Highest Wealthy Incomes: 284thRudest Citizens: 444thLargest Agricultural Sector: 496th
The Hoary Goliath of
Corporate Bordello
Near the kraken sleepeth stirs coral and bone
Goliath Tusk
Influence
Handshaker
Anachronistic Monumental Architecture
Region
Civil Rights
Excellent
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Excessive

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Mastodon

Population10.715 billion

CapitalElephantine
LeaderGoliath Tusk
FaithNorse Black Magic

Currencykrone
AnimalWoolly Mammoth

The Hoary Goliath of Mastodon is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Goliath Tusk with a fair hand, and remarkable for its otherworldly petting zoo, enslaved workforce, and daily referendums. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 10.715 billion Mastodons are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The medium-sized, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Elephantine. The average income tax rate is 95.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Mastodon economy, worth a remarkable 3,427 trillion kroner a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an amazing 319,924 kroner, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,866,458 per year while the poor average 4,598, a ratio of 623 to 1.

Citizens need a magnifying glass and color chart to distinguish between nearly identical brand labels, being sent to collections is more dangerous than ever, human resources employees have time for hobbies as harassment is designated "high praise", and anti-vaxxers claim that injected children are prone to psychotic breaks when they see the 'Queen of Diamonds' playing card. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Mastodon's national animal is the Woolly Mammoth, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Norse Black Magic.

Mastodon is ranked 178,888th in the world and 2nd in Dinotopia for Most Stationary, with 79.83215724072 days.

Top
1%
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 284thRudest Citizens: 444thLargest Agricultural Sector: 496thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 902ndGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 947thMost Efficient Economies: 989thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,413thLargest Publishing Industry: 1,461stMost Cheerful Citizens: 1,594thMost Cultured: 1,633rdSmartest Citizens: 1,781stHighest Food Quality: 2,144thHighest Average Incomes: 2,346thLargest Governments: 2,447thMost Developed: 2,798thTop
5%
Largest Retail Industry: 2,995thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 3,206thMost Subsidized Industry: 3,402ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 3,781stMost Inclusive: 4,059thHealthiest Citizens: 5,407thLongest Average Lifespans: 5,544thMost Valuable International Artwork: 5,849thHighest Average Tax Rates: 5,854thHighest Economic Output: 5,990thLowest Crime Rates: 5,997thMost Secular: 6,051stLargest Welfare Programs: 6,708thNicest Citizens: 8,211thMost Advanced Public Education: 8,635thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 9,988thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 11,153rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 11,321stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 12,471stTop
10%
Most Patriotic: 14,919thMost Compassionate Citizens: 15,927thMost Beautiful Environments: 16,160thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 17,029thMost Advanced Public Transport: 17,615thMost Corrupt Governments: 19,890thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 20,907thSafest: 21,770thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 23,289thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 24,279thMost Pro-Market: 24,742ndLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 25,039thMost Politically Free: 27,813th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Mastodon's influence in Dinotopia rose from "Truckler" to "Handshaker".
  • : Mastodon's influence in Dinotopia rose from "Vassal" to "Truckler".
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, anti-vaxxers claim that injected children are prone to psychotic breaks when they see the 'Queen of Diamonds' playing card.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, human resources employees have time for hobbies as harassment is designated "high praise".
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, being sent to collections is more dangerous than ever.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, citizens need a magnifying glass and color chart to distinguish between nearly identical brand labels.
  • : Mastodon was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Patriotic.
  • : Mastodon's influence in Dinotopia rose from "Apprentice" to "Vassal".
  • : Mastodon was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Retail Industry.
  • : Following new legislation in Mastodon, chickens roam the streets freely.

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