The Kingdom of Lachau is a very large, genial nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, public floggings, and national health service. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 387 million Lachauans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Johanns. The average income tax rate is 34.0%.

The Lachauan economy, worth 17.7 trillion rubles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is dominated by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Information Technology. Average income is 45,863 rubles, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.3 times as much as the poorest.

Talking during class is a gateway to lifelong drug addiction, the nation's industries are scrambling to switch to biodegradable plastics, Lachau has designated Johanns as its capital city, and every workday begins with group therapy. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lachau's national animal is the eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Lachau is ranked 68,026^th in the world and 44^th in Coalition of Crown Albatross for Nicest Citizens, with 16.29 average smiles per day.