The Overpriced Food of FIVE GUYS is a gargantuan, safe nation, notable for its disturbing lack of elderly people, avant-garde cinema, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 10.011 billion guys are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 39.2%.

The very strong FIVE GUYSian economy, worth 628 trillion terrible skype chats a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is broadly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 62,766 terrible skype chats, with the richest citizens earning 6.7 times as much as the poorest.

Soldiers on first dates introduce themselves only by their ranks and serial numbers, pareidolic SETI scientists swear there's a message from aliens hidden within pi, virtual assistants are seen with increasing suspicion every time they get an upgrade, and the FIVE GUYSian Intelligence Agency has put 'Project Quantum Refrigerator' on hold indefinitely. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. FIVE GUYS's national animal is the defender, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

FIVE GUYS is ranked 120,100^th in the world and 3^rd in Communist Movement for Nicest Citizens, with 12 average smiles per day.