The United Balkan states of Epic bannana is a mammoth, orderly nation, ruled by Lukas andriulis with an iron fist, and remarkable for its teetotalling pirates, free-roaming dinosaurs, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 7.24 billion Epic bannanans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Environment, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vilnius. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 15.1%.

The powerhouse Epic bannanan economy, worth 458 trillion Pesetas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Cheese Exports, Furniture Restoration, Retail, and Information Technology. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 63,194 Pesetas, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 217,178 per year while the poor average 13,484, a ratio of 16.1 to 1.

Lukas andriulis's latest speech included a bizarre reference to MaxWow incontinence pads being 50% more absorbent than the next leading brand, having skeletons in one's closet is no longer just a macabre idiom, there is no war in Vilnius, and all tribal children are set for life with guaranteed government jobs. Crime is all-pervasive, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Epic bannana's national animal is the lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

Epic bannana is ranked 321,182^nd in the world and 9^th in Aura for Least Corrupt Governments, with 37.75 percentage of bribes refused.