by Max Barry

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Largest Mining Sector: 14thLargest Black Market: 14thHighest Economic Output: 40th
The Archbishopric of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Begin en eand doot mekaar de hand
Influence
Sprat
Region
Civil Rights
Outlawed
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Twente

Population43.18 billion

CapitalEanske
LeaderArchbishop Gerhardus Janman
FaithSaxon Catholicism

CurrencyMark
AnimalSteed

The Archbishopric of Twente is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Archbishop Gerhardus Janman with an iron fist, and renowned for its rampant corporate plagiarism, ubiquitous missile silos, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 43.18 billion Tubantians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Spirituality and Education also on the agenda, while Environment and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Eanske. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Tubantian economy, worth an astonishing 28,063 trillion Marks a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is a breathtaking 649,916 Marks, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,567,680 per year while the poor average 111,373, a ratio of 23.1 to 1.

Penny whistles have been rebranded 'tin hornpipes', carrots are orange, apples are red and food waste is increasing, the government says that Possession is nine-tenths of the Lore, and children spend all morning taking out a comma and all afternoon putting it back in again. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Twente's national animal is the Steed, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Saxon Catholicism.

Twente is ranked 352nd in the world and 2nd in Europe for Highest Wealthy Incomes, with 2.57 million Standard Monetary Units.

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1%
Largest Mining Sector: 14thLargest Black Market: 14thHighest Economic Output: 40thMost Devout: 58thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 68thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 71stMost Advanced Public Transport: 82ndLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 97thHighest Average Incomes: 124thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 137thMost Patriotic: 141stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 150thLargest Populations: 162ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 164thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 198thLowest Crime Rates: 279thLargest Governments: 317thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 352ndLargest Insurance Industry: 446thMost Corrupt Governments: 450thHighest Average Tax Rates: 657thMost Armed: 794thMost Stationary: 799thLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,292ndLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,841stMost Subsidized Industry: 2,792ndMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,972ndTop
5%
Most Efficient Economies: 3,406thMost Valuable International Artwork: 3,597thMost Advanced Public Education: 3,721stMost Developed: 4,386thFattest Citizens: 4,551stLargest Welfare Programs: 4,763rdMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 5,482ndMost Influential: 7,399thMost Conservative: 7,660thMost Primitive: 10,103rdLongest Average Lifespans: 10,449thHighest Poor Incomes: 10,696thSmartest Citizens: 11,395thMost Authoritarian: 12,832ndTop
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Most Scientifically Advanced: 17,712thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 21,067th
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1%
Most Devout: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Populations: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2nd in the regionMost Patriotic: 2nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Stationary: 5th in the regionLargest Governments: 5th in the regionMost Armed: 6th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 7th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 7th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 8th in the regionTop
5%
Highest Average Tax Rates: 13th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 16th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 21st in the regionMost Conservative: 23rd in the regionMost Primitive: 25th in the regionFattest Citizens: 28th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 28th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 41st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 60th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 60th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 60th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 62nd in the regionTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 66th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 73rd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 90th in the regionMost Developed: 92nd in the regionMost Extreme: 97th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Twente, children spend all morning taking out a comma and all afternoon putting it back in again.
  • : Following new legislation in Twente, the government says that Possession is nine-tenths of the Lore.
  • : Following new legislation in Twente, carrots are orange, apples are red and food waste is increasing.
  • : Following new legislation in Twente, penny whistles have been rebranded 'tin hornpipes'.
  • : Following new legislation in Twente, hospitals fear government fines more than terrorist ransoms.
  • : Following new legislation in Twente, prison walls have had to be modified to keep parkour-trained criminals from escaping.
  • : Following new legislation in Twente, inheritance tax has recently been abolished.
  • : Twente was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Advanced Law Enforcement.
  • : Following new legislation in Twente, private records are being put online with a convenient "download" button.
  • : Following new legislation in Twente, diplomats shake hands with their right and hide a poison dagger in their left.

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