The Ursae Majoris of Bilabao is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Krling Eagge with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, lack of airports, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, cheerful population of 49.985 billion Bilabaons are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Education, with Administration, Environment, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of North Pole. The average income tax rate is 60.0%.

The powerhouse Bilabaoan economy, worth a remarkable 3,436 trillion icicles a year, is quite specialized and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Cheese Exports, and Tourism. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is 68,745 icicles, with the richest citizens earning 5.0 times as much as the poorest.

The Violet Mile now refers to the long line-ups that former death row inmates wait in as they transfer to maximum security prisons, terrorists who are 17th cousins with the ex-wives of half-brothers of citizens are now exempt from the immigration ban, the nation's leading climatologists are investigating animal flatulence in efforts to reduce methane emissions, and the invisible hand of the market wipes babies' bottoms. Crime, especially youth-related, is well under control, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bilabao's national animal is the polar bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Bilabao is ranked 172,112^th in the world and 7^th in The Arctic for Most Extensive Civil Rights, with 48.89 Martin Luther King, Jr. Units.