The Autocracy of Sjovenia is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Autarch Ferdinand Tennfjord with an even hand, and remarkable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, strictly enforced bedtime, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 28.788 billion Sjovenes are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt morass — juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sovija. The average income tax rate is 90.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Sjovene economy, worth a remarkable 2,301 trillion Tolars a year, is extremely specialized and solely comprised of the Arms Manufacturing industry. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 79,946 Tolars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Old dogs don't have to learn new tricks but they have to prove they haven't forgotten old ones, pet loving officers arrest citizens who don't give their dogs enough biscuits, the Coast Guard is pioneering a quixotic program to train fish, and organisations with 800 in their phone number are often raided by special forces. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Sjovenia's national animal is the Velika Zimska Sova, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Roman Catholic and Eastern Orthodox.

Sjovenia is ranked 5,551^st in the world and 276^th in Balder for Lowest Crime Rates, with 113.94 law-abiding acts per hour.