The Unstable Culture

and so you're back
from outer space
I just walked in to find you here
with that sad look upon your face
I should have changed my stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I had known for just one second
you'd be back to bother me

Congrats on being featured, friends.

Welcome, visitors! As founder of the region that houses an Unstable Culture, I believe it is my duty to explain to ye newcomers why this culture is so unstable. Here is a quick review of each nation present within this VERY small geographic area. I am certain a quick skimming of this will demonstrate why our region's culture is so unstable.

The Plutocratic Hellhole of Mechanized Capitalism - Corporate Police State
Founded by the CEO's of several large international corporations, the Plutocracy of Mechanized Capitalism is a small, barren desert location that has been thoroughly mined for its natural resources. The government - which is an efficient, military-industrial-prison complex run by a small council of the country's largest corporations - regularly develops policy to ensure the nation is a world leader in terms of high profits and low costs.

The Arbitrary Will of Your Parents - Iron Fist Consumerists
We are your parents. You must listen to mommy. You must listen to daddy. We support this family. We guide this family. Our will is the final authority. Obey it, and you will live well. Disobey it at your own risk.

The Repressed Holy Church of A Religious Nutjob - Psychotic Dictatorship
A large religious cult subject to the whims of their prophetic leader, who believes in a strict aesthetic lifestyle. Everything beyond his will is banned.

The Constitutional Monarchy of Blue Bloods - Right-Wing Utopia
A small-government monarchy, with a bicameral representative parliament, with the Upper House representing landed interests and the Lower House representing everyone else. Very much focused on productive commerce and defending the motherland, as well as spreading Christian values.

The Hegemonic Tyranny of Conformism - Moralistic Democracy
Every individual member of society stands in judgement of their fellow man in this nation. Thus, every citizen is careful to restrain their behavior to what is socially acceptable. The will of the government is highly respected by the citizenry, and it is believed to represent the will of the people due to the secret ballot, which allows each citizen to vote for a world that they believe to be morally correct while feeling assured that the enactment of their desired policy will result in the actuation of said ideal.

The Holy Islamic Republic of Shabul - Authoritarian Democracy
An Islamic Democratic Republic modeled on the Republic of Iran. Run according to the principals of sharia law and Muslim fraternity. Shabul places income equality and charity high on its list of priorities, as well as a moral lifestyle.

The Utter Nonsense and Drivel of Hilarious Teabaggers - Free-Market Paradise
The Tea Party decided to found its own nation in our region. Generally concerned with Christian Values, Free Markets, and a voting system that ensures third-parties can have a decent effect on any election. Generally populated by folks who never realized that the Great Awakening ended 200 years ago and that government intervention saved capitalism in the 1890's and 1930's in their own country.

The Rural Home-Spun Wisdom of Agrarians - Conservative Democracy
We don't take kindly to outsiders around here.

The General Complacency of Utilitarian Democracy - Tyranny by the Majority
In this particular area, the reigns of government have been seized by radical populists highly influenced by Jeremy Bentham. Regarding all citizens as inherently identical units, this government has proceeded to operate under the mantra of "the greatest good to the greatest number", defining "good" as "whatever the most recent plebiscite says should happen."

The Dominion of Keynesians - Compulsory Consumerist State
This dominion was a breakaway state from The Conservative Republic of The Right Wing. Tired of the constant boom-bust cycle, and frustrated that the folks with the very competence to correct the problem - economists - were denied access to the reigns of government to correct the issue, a group of elite financiers, investors, and skilled workers formed this nation as a econocratic nation of constant investment. The government operates under the assumption that in the long run, everybody is dead, and therefore no expense should be spared in ensuring that markets run smoothly and have uninterrupted growth. All policy is also designed to maximize consumer or government spending - saving without investing is practical heresy.

The Holy Empire of The Franciscan Order - Father Knows Best State
An outpost of the Catholic Order of Franciscan Friars.

The Queendom of A Flock of Nuns - Mother Knows Best State
We don't know what their deal is, but they came with the friars.

The Brave Honor and Virtue of Fearless Leader - Corrupt Dictatorship
A seemingly benevolent regime run by a very popular tyrant who spends most of his time ensuring no one attacks his people and none of his people decide that they don't want to be "his" people.

The Conservative Republic of The Right Wing - Capitalist Paradise
Down-to-earth self-employed folks who just want the security of knowing that their property rights are protected and that no one will attack their little enclave.

The Reasonable Cooperative of Pragmatic Individuals - Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
A group of folks highly concerned with philosophical matters, maintaining their well-being, developing technology, and ensuring the young learn to think critically. Always looking for ways to improve their society.

The Democratic Socialist States of The Leftists - Democratic Socialists
This nation is very concerned with the future of humanity, working hard to transition to a society where all humans are able to fully blossom as highly educated, self-motivated, socially conscious beings.

The Incorporated Conglomerate of General Enterprises - Corporate Bordello
This is a large tract of land owned by a single conglomerate corporation. Every employee, which represents the entire work force, has a guaranteed amount of shares in the company, which represents their ability to "vote" for policy. All employees, however, are allowed to purchase more shares, and those with the largest shares have the largest voice.

The Wikistate of Open-Source Governance - New York Times Democracy
This government decided early on to normalize the internet by integrating it into everyday life, and now all government policy is drawn up on a wiki and submitted to an online poll.

The Committee of College Professors - Liberal Democratic Socialists
This is a society run democratically for the purposes of ensuring that all citizens are up-to-date on the most recent studies, be they scientific or humanitarian. The economy is regulated to ensure that each member of the society has the time, training, and incentive to understand even the most trivial of academic controversies, and thus play a part in the process of interpreting reality.

The Endless Military Campaign of The War Men - Benevolent Dictatorship
A highly militaristic nation concerned with values such as Honor and Virtue. Each member of this society is required to submit their individual sovereignty to the State, and in return a vast array of benefits are bestowed upon them after serving their time. Modeled after the Greek city-state of Sparta.

The Administrative Technate of Technocratic Management - Libertarian Police State
This nation is managed by a collective body of councils composed of scientists, engineers, technicians, and accomplished academics, who rely on vast bodies of research to make the most sound, efficient decisions for the operation of the economy. Labor-saving technology is emphasized in all areas of industry, and the advantages of this technology on the international trade market are translated into a living wage funded by the nationalized profits. Many citizens find ways to get by without working, and the rest generally have short work hours, which leaves them with plenty of free time to do as they please.

The Revolutionary Uproar of The Angry Proletariat - Iron Fist Socialists
Many years ago, the working poor of this nation organized as a militant political force against the ruling elite and established a dictatorship government that plans all industry for the benefit of the working class. However, conformity in political matters is highly stressed in this state. If one shows up to work, does one's required job, and does not speak out against the state, one could live a highly gratifying and reasonably affluent lifestyle in this society.

The Anarcho-Capitalist Society of Objectivists - Capitalizt
A haven for Ayn Rand fans, this nation is entirely privatized, right down to the legislature.

The Crippling Problem of Youth-Related Crime - Left-Leaning College State
This nation is the bastion of rebellious youth. Most inhabitants are college students who commute outside of the nation to whatever school in the surrounding countries they go to, or attend one of the nation's famous universities. All government is funded by the Land Tax which encourages urban living and temporary ownership, and a progressive tax which ensures a certain degree of income equality. One of the most socially liberal countries in the region, many are put off by the "constant party" atmosphere that permeates the nation.

The Earth-Mother Leadership of Tree Women - Scandinavian Liberal Paradise
An egalitarian and semi-matriarchal federation of tribes that has inhabited this region for centuries. These tribes are suspicious of industrial technologies, though do make use of solar power and other technologies that "harness" latent energy rather than produce it. Most of these tribes live a hunter-gatherer lifestyle.

The Steel A-Frame Caravan of Wandering Pikies - Anarchy
This isn't so much a nation, so much as a tribe that is constantly traveling through the various nations in this regions. The only "rule" in this tribe is that the pikies stick together and keep their RV's close in case any threat approaches, in which case they will circle and form an encampment.

The Automated Superabundance of Post-Scarcity Freedom - Civil-Rights Lovefest
A long time ago, the workers in this nation formed various spontaneous decentralized unions and workers council, and militantly resisted all government attempts to oust them from occupations of their financially insolvent factories which were on the brink of being repossessed by the state bank. Eventually, all companies in the nation came to be run under the democratic worker cooperative model, and thus markets continue to efficiently allocate goods, but workers at the local level democratically decide how much of a good should be produced at the local level and how profits should be divided. As a result, few go without and most work less than 20 hours a week due to the technologically ensured and equitably distributed abundance.

The Eurozone Meltdown Crisis of Imploded Mediterranea - Left-Wing Utopia
After the fall of the Greek and Italian state-operated financial institutions, a full-blown riot resulted in a form of mob-rule where property rights have been abolished and the state attempts to prop up whatever economic institutions it can in hopes of maintaining order and abundance. This nation is an odd mix of post-apocalyptic social unrest and highly-sustainable post-modern technology ensuring an affluent lifestyle for the general citizenry.

I hope you feel well-acquainted with this region. Feel free to telegram us at any time if you have any questions.

Enjoy your visit,
The Arbitrary Will of Your Parents