by Max Barry

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The Most Alphabetically Ascendent in Russia

Linguistic experts debated late into the night to place nations in alphabetical order.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Community of Alexey NavalnyLiberal Democratic Socialists“I'm not going to appeal to violence or aggression...”
2.The Doctors Recommendation of An Apple A DayIron Fist Consumerists“An Apple a Day Keeps the Doctor Away!”
3.The Free State of AzovInoffensive Centrist Democracy“Незламний”
4.The United Socialist States of BakhromaNew York Times Democracy“Занято́й, как пчела́”
5.The Buttastrophe of ButtstanPsychotic Dictatorship“Shirtless on a horse? Try elderly, bald, and bloated!”
6.The United Socialist States of Colbala ConIron Fist Consumerists“You Can't Stop Progress”
7.The Greatness of Empress Catherine IIIron Fist Consumerists“I praise loudly, I blame softly.”
8.The Commonwealth of Hiroshima-NagasakiBenevolent Dictatorship“For a brighter future”
9.The Republic of KerenskyNew York Times Democracy“Единство”
10.The United Socialist States of LeninissimoPsychotic Dictatorship“Mission Accomplished: Communism!”
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