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The Free Land of Woolitania

“Lassen Sie mich Arzt, ich bin durch!”

Category: New York Times Democracy
Civil Rights:
Excellent
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Superb

Regional Influence: Minnow

Location: Europe

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Free Land of Woolitania is a gargantuan, economically powerful nation, ruled by Leader with a fair hand, and renowned for its irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, intelligent population of 20.419 billion Woolitanians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent government stops and the rest of society begins, but it devotes most of its attentions to Education, with areas such as Religion & Spirituality and Defence receiving almost no funds by comparison. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Woolitania City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 68%. A powerhouse of a private sector is dominated by the Book Publishing industry.

Rioting during the nation's hosting of ORDER caused one million woolians of property damage, the alarmingly racist TV show 'Bigtopians Say the Darndest Things' is a hit, the government is avowedly atheist, and Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity. Crime is totally unknown. Woolitania's national animal is the woolpertinger, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its currency is the woolian.

Woolitania is ranked 381st in Europe and 119,822nd in the world for Largest Soda Pop Sector, scoring -17 on the Addison-Fukk Productivity Rating.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 19 hours ago

  • 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity.
  • 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, the government is avowedly atheist.
  • 1 day 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, the alarmingly racist TV show 'Bigtopians Say the Darndest Things' is a hit.
  • 1 day 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, rioting during the nation's hosting of ORDER caused one million woolians of property damage.
  • 2 days 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, surrealist houses shaped like mushrooms and volcanoes dominate the wealthiest neighborhoods.
  • 2 days 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, morning coffees are no longer the same since the disappearance of newspapers.
  • 3 days 7 hours ago: Woolitania was reclassified from "Inoffensive Centrist Democracy" to "New York Times Democracy".
  • 3 days 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, vitriolic divorce proceedings have become prime-time television.
  • 3 days 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, cheese has become the new icon of political dissent.
  • 3 days 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Woolitania, the nation is now proudly cholera-free.

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by Max Barry

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