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National Flag

The Republic of United Kodiaks

“Nemo me impune lacessit.”

Category: Corporate Bordello
Civil Rights:
Good
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Excellent

Regional Influence: Duckspeaker

Location: Capitalist Paradise

OverviewFactbookPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Republic of United Kodiaks is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Yogi Bear with a fair hand, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, public floggings, and unlimited-speed roads. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 7.68 billion Kodiak Bears are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The minute, pro-business government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kodiak. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Kodiakese economy, worth a remarkable 1,259 trillion Bottle Caps a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 163,999 Bottle Caps, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 664,944 per year while the poor average 26,925, a ratio of 24.7 to 1.

Child adoption by homosexual couples has been outlawed, morning coffees are no longer the same since the disappearance of newspapers, construction of the Really Big Hadron Collider is underway, and cyber-crime and tin-foil hat sales are both increasing at record rates. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. United Kodiaks's national animal is the Chinook Salmon, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Ursalism.

United Kodiaks is ranked 64th in Capitalist Paradise and 4,479th in the world for Most Scientifically Advanced, scoring 260 on the Kurzweil Singularity Index.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 12 hours ago

  • 1 day 15 hours ago: Following new legislation in United Kodiaks, cyber-crime and tin-foil hat sales are both increasing at record rates.
  • 2 days 1 hour ago: United Kodiaks was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector (last census: Top 5%).
  • 2 days 20 hours ago: United Kodiaks endorsed The Empire of Coltpower.
  • 3 days 1 hour ago: United Kodiaks fell out of the world Top 10% for Most Devout.
  • 3 days 3 hours ago: Following new legislation in United Kodiaks, construction of the Really Big Hadron Collider is underway.
  • 3 days 9 hours ago: United Kodiaks was endorsed by The Empire of Coltpower.
  • 3 days 9 hours ago: United Kodiaks voted against the World Assembly Resolution "War Crimes Tribunal".
  • 8 days ago: United Kodiaks was reclassified from "Capitalist Paradise" to "Corporate Bordello".
  • 11 days ago: United Kodiaks voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Disabled Voters Act".
  • 17 days ago: United Kodiaks was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Publishing Industry (last census: Top 5%).

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by Max Barry

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