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The Nomadic Peoples of Turnstile Number 1

“We're number 1”

Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights:
Average
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Some

Regional Influence: Vassal

Location: Professor Hells Bot World

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Nomadic Peoples of Turnstile Number 1 is a gargantuan, devout nation, ruled by President Turner with an even hand, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 11.954 billion Turnstile Number 1ians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it is effectively ruled by the Department of Law & Order, with areas such as the Environment and Social Equality receiving almost no funds by comparison. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of One Good Turn. The average income tax rate is 78%, and even higher for the wealthy. The private sector is almost wholly made up of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out.

Citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns, reporters often lose their jobs over fact-checking errors, major cities shut down as their local sports team takes to the field every day, and cremation is compulsory for the deceased. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Turnstile Number 1's national animal is the eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, its national religion is Monotheism, and its currency is the unit.

Turnstile Number 1 is ranked 63rd in Professor Hells Bot World and 116,305th in the world for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -9 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 11 hours ago

  • 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, cremation is compulsory for the deceased.
  • 1 day 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, major cities shut down as their local sports team takes to the field every day.
  • 2 days 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, reporters often lose their jobs over fact-checking errors.
  • 3 days 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns.
  • 4 days ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, vile black smog from coal power plants has enveloped several major urban centres.
  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, the government is buying children's books by the thousands.
  • 10 days ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, the government is pursuing a new programme aimed at promoting cultural sophistication.
  • 11 days ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, minority children spend hours bussing to schools miles away from home.
  • 12 days ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, immigrant herding has become a national pastime.
  • 13 days ago: Following new legislation in Turnstile Number 1, schoolchildren have twice-weekly sex education classes.

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by Max Barry

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