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The Urmel Island of Titiwu

“Dreaming of the Cretaceous”

Category: New York Times Democracy
Civil Rights:
Excellent
Economy:
Imploded
Political Freedoms:
World Benchmark

Regional Influence: Truckler

Location: Haiku

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Urmel Island of Titiwu is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Seelefant with a fair hand, and renowned for its punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, intelligent population of 15.843 billion Titiwuans enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent government stops and the rest of society begins, but it is mainly concerned with Education, although the Environment and Social Equality are secondary priorities. The average income tax rate is 63%, and even higher for the wealthy. The private sector is almost wholly made up of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out.

Elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume, space shuttles regularly launch rubbish into space, noises louder than a whisper have been prohibited by law, and people are moving into treehouses in record numbers. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is a problem, and the police force struggles against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Titiwu's national animal is the Urmel, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its currency is the sea shell.

Titiwu is ranked 2nd in Haiku and 260th in the world for Best Weather, with 880 Metres of Sunlight Above Expected.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 15 days ago

  • 7 days ago: Titiwu fell out of the regional Top 10% for Largest Basket Weaving Sector.
  • 15 days ago: Following new legislation in Titiwu, people are moving into treehouses in record numbers.
  • 33 days ago: Titiwu was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Most Rebellious Youth.
  • 36 days ago: Following new legislation in Titiwu, noises louder than a whisper have been prohibited by law.
  • 36 days ago: Following new legislation in Titiwu, space shuttles regularly launch rubbish into space.
  • 36 days ago: Following new legislation in Titiwu, elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume.
  • 37 days ago: Titiwu lodged a message on the Haiku Regional Message Board.
  • 47 days ago: Titiwu was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens (last census: Top 5%).
  • 50 days ago: Titiwu fell out of the regional Top 10% for Best Weather.
  • 52 days ago: Titiwu fell out of the regional Top 10% for Nicest Citizens.

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by Max Barry

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