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The Amerikanisches Reich of ThinkPads

“Rebellis ut tyrannus est obsequium ut Deus”

Category: Corporate Bordello
Civil Rights:
Good
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Superb

Regional Influence: Eminence Grise

Location: libertarian

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Amerikanisches Reich of ThinkPads is a gargantuan, economically powerful nation, ruled by General Disapproval with a fair hand, and notable for its unlimited-speed roads. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 18.698 billion ThinkPadsians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, pro-business, outspoken individuals is primarily concerned with Law & Order, with Industry and Public Transport also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare are ignored. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient ThinkPadsian economy, worth a remarkable 5,524 trillion gold ounces a year, is driven entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 295,468 gold ounces, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,401,901 per year while the poor average 36,749, a ratio of 38.1 to 1.

Third party candidates are now gaining some representation in Parliament, brazen mayors claim official expenses to pay for their drug habits, discarded pennies litter the streets, and inheritance tax has recently been abolished. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. ThinkPads's national animal is the housecat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

ThinkPads is ranked 2nd in libertarian and 180th in the world for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring 14 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 1 day 3 hours ago

  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, inheritance tax has recently been abolished.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, discarded pennies litter the streets.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, brazen mayors claim official expenses to pay for their drug habits.
  • 8 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, third party candidates are now gaining some representation in Parliament.
  • 8 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, surrealist houses shaped like mushrooms and volcanoes dominate the wealthiest neighborhoods.
  • 10 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, drunk drivers are sentenced to death.
  • 11 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, immigrant herding has become a national pastime.
  • 12 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, most governmental positions are filled by zealous nationalists.
  • 13 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, the government regularly hires contractors to construct high rise apartments.
  • 13 days ago: Following new legislation in ThinkPads, Pinkerton agents are called in to forcibly break up white collar strikes.

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by Max Barry

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