The Empire of The First Grand Reich is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Captain Spock with an iron fist, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, compulsory military service, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 16.606 billion Grand Reichians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Environment, and Administration also on the agenda, while Social Policy isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Dortmund. The average income tax rate is 92.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Grand Reichian economy, worth a remarkable 2,127 trillion Eagles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Trout Farming. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 128,136 Eagles, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Pulling weeds is seen as a threat to national security, politicians literally speak literally, the new Grand Reichian-made OS is buggier and more inconvenient than a horse-drawn carriage, and soldiers are taught to throw their guns at their enemies once the bullets have run out. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The First Grand Reich's national animal is the Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

The First Grand Reich is ranked 10,782^nd in the world and 269^th in the Rejected Realms for Lowest Crime Rates, with 99.66 law-abiding acts per hour.