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The Grand Duchy of The Chestnut Tree Cafe

“Freedom is the freedom to say 2+2 = 4”

Category: New York Times Democracy
Civil Rights:
Very Good
Economy:
Strong
Political Freedoms:
Superb

Regional Influence: Ambassador

Location: libertarian

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Grand Duchy of The Chestnut Tree Cafe is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Emmanuel Goldstein with a fair hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls. Its compassionate, intelligent population of 7.936 billion enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent government stops and the rest of society begins, but it concentrates mainly on Education, although Public Transport and Law & Order are on the agenda. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Airstrip One. The average income tax rate is 71%. The private sector is almost wholly made up of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out.

Oil executives can be seen reluctantly cleaning oil-soaked birds, the government has implemented minimum wage laws, school uniforms are compulsory, and guns are banned. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Chestnut Tree Cafe's national animal is the giraffe, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the spangle.

The Chestnut Tree Cafe is ranked 35th in libertarian and 119,090th in the world for Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry, scoring -9 on the Tasmanian Pulp Environmental Export Index.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 11 hours ago

  • 2 hours ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, guns are banned.
  • 2 hours ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, school uniforms are compulsory.
  • 2 hours ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, the government has implemented minimum wage laws.
  • 2 days 2 hours ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, oil executives can be seen reluctantly cleaning oil-soaked birds.
  • 2 days 2 hours ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets.
  • 2 days 2 hours ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, scenic mountain valleys are flooded with water as damming projects get underway.
  • 2 days 2 hours ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, the people of The Chestnut Tree Cafe are renowned for their nihilistic attitudes.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, the fire protection service is wholly government-funded.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume.
  • 7 days ago: Following new legislation in The Chestnut Tree Cafe, new safety regulations require all cars manufactured in The Chestnut Tree Cafe to be bombproof.

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by Max Barry

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