The Sword of Spynland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Guido I with a fair hand, and remarkable for its spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 24.255 billion Spynlandians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The medium-sized, pro-business government prioritizes Education, with Law & Order and Healthcare also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Spyno. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 17.4%.

The very strong Spynlandian economy, worth a remarkable 1,313 trillion Rings a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Pizza Delivery, Basket Weaving, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 54,169 Rings, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 246,525 per year while the poor average 7,276, a ratio of 33.9 to 1.

Spynism has been named as Spynland's national religion, Guido I has just been declared ruler of Spynland in an international press conference, Spynland has designated Spyno as its capital city, and mining is the nation's most dangerous occupation. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Spynland's national animal is the duck, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Spynism.

Spynland is ranked 244,256^th in the world and 1^st in Totialian Confederacy for Lowest Crime Rates, with 53.64 law-abiding acts per hour.