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The All-Pervasive Infestation of Socialist Cockroaches

“Cockroaches shall rule the world!”

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Imploded
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Hegemony

Location: Roach Hell

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The All-Pervasive Infestation of Socialist Cockroaches is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by King Nicole Judge with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory vegetarianism. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 23.286 billion cockroaches are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Olson Middle School. The income tax rate is 100%.

The large but stagnant Socialist Cockroachesian economy, worth 712 trillion toilet paper rolls a year, is driven entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 30,576 toilet paper rolls, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The sound of wooden legs echo throughout Socialist Cockroaches after the recent introduction of the Foot Tax, people regularly disappear off the streets and all evidence of them is destroyed, a well-funded social safety net protects the unfortunate, and families are only permitted to have one child. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Socialist Cockroaches's national animal is the human, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is state atheism.

Socialist Cockroaches is ranked 1st in Roach Hell and 37th in the world for Most Beautiful Environments, with 8,515.6 Pounds of Wildlife less Pounds of Concrete per square mile.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 2 days 14 hours ago

  • 12 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, families are only permitted to have one child.
  • 13 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, a well-funded social safety net protects the unfortunate.
  • 20 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, people regularly disappear off the streets and all evidence of them is destroyed.
  • 27 days ago: Socialist Cockroaches was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Income Equality.
  • 36 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, the sound of wooden legs echo throughout Socialist Cockroaches after the recent introduction of the Foot Tax.
  • 36 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, the words 'private' and 'enterprise' must never appear in the same sentence.
  • 41 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, a government program is underway to revitalize Socialist Cockroaches's beaches.
  • 41 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, the nation is ravaged by daily union strikes.
  • 41 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, only government officials may operate computers.
  • 41 days ago: Following new legislation in Socialist Cockroaches, postmen have been arrested in job lots for selling junk mail as home insulation.

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by Max Barry

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