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“Be not what you are, but the animal you shall become.”

The Matriarchy of Skitivia is a huge, safe nation, remarkable for its irreverence towards religion. Its cynical population of 647 million are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, socially-minded government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and the Environment. The average income tax rate is 100%. The private sector is almost wholly made up of enterprising fourteen-year-old boys selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out.

A ban on unsolicited cold calling in all forms is in effect, the mob and the police have recently had numerous clashes in the back alleys of Skitivia's cities due to the government's steadfast anti-casino stance, the breathalyser pledge is a traditional part of marriages in Skitivia, and customs turn away those considered to have an unfavourable ethnicity. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown. Skitivia's national animal is the Puggna, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its currency is the Kapal.

Skitivia is ranked 1st in the region and 53,585th in the world for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector.