The Queen's Royal Province of Salmon Valley is a gargantuan, safe nation, notable for its compulsory military service, state-planned economy, and punitive income tax rates. The cynical population of 29.176 billion Salmon Vallioans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Environment, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital Heights. The average income tax rate is 75.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Salmon Valleyian economy, worth 993 trillion betales a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Book Publishing, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 34,048 betales, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

The latest Harry Potter book is a bestseller, streakers swamp all public events in order to bare it all, foreigners are treated with great suspicion, and Salmon Valley has designated Capital Heights as its capital city. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Salmon Valley's national animal is the deer, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Salmon Valley is ranked 100,541^st in the world and 60^th in Ancient Lands for Lowest Crime Rates, with 65.78 law-abiding acts per hour.