Omigodtheykilledkenny was Condemned by Security Council Resolution # 17
Most Armed: 62nd Fattest Citizens: 77th Highest Crime Rates: 79th
The Mysterion Rising of
You bastards!
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The Mysterion Rising of Omigodtheykilledkenny is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Sammy Faisano with an even hand, and remarkable for its frequent executions, infamous sell-swords, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 24.555 billion Kennyites enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, although Industry is also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Paradise City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Kennyite economy, worth an astonishing 11,138 trillion tree-fiddies a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Soda Sales, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is an amazing 453,603 tree-fiddies, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,004,559 per year while the poor average 26,328, a ratio of 114 to 1.

Maxtopian tourists make expensive pilgrimages to Paradise City to enjoy their national art, surveillance cameras are banned, surfers ride tsunamis of record height and toxicity, and the military struggles with recruitment. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, probably because of the absence of a police force. Omigodtheykilledkenny's national animal is the Loch Ness Monster, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is idol worship.

Omigodtheykilledkenny is ranked 4,257th in the world and 4th in Antarctic Oasis for Largest Black Market, with 111 trillion Standard Monetary Units.

Most Armed: 62ndFattest Citizens: 77thHighest Crime Rates: 79thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 80thMost Efficient Economies: 96thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 96thLargest Gambling Industry: 104thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 105thRudest Citizens: 122ndLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 140thLargest Retail Industry: 141stHighest Economic Output: 149thMost Avoided: 160thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 168thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 213thHighest Average Incomes: 215thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 225thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 242ndLargest Insurance Industry: 312thMost Rebellious Youth: 327thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 348thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 422ndMost Stationary: 459thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 587thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 636thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 694thLargest Mining Sector: 767thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 899thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,412thMost Influential: 1,448thTop
Largest Populations: 1,563rdLargest Publishing Industry: 1,986thLargest Information Technology Sector: 2,607thLargest Agricultural Sector: 2,861stGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 3,200thMost Cultured: 3,559thMost Pro-Market: 3,932ndMost Corrupt Governments: 4,211thLargest Black Market: 4,257thTop
Smartest Citizens: 7,704thNudest: 8,554thHighest Drug Use: 14,581stMost Extensive Civil Rights: 14,814th
Largest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionMost Stationary: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionMost Armed: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Populations: 2nd in the regionMost Avoided: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2nd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 2nd in the regionTop
Largest Agricultural Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Cultured: 3rd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 3rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 4th in the region

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by Max Barry

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