The Dirty Cheats of
Compulsory Consumerist State
You're going home in a f**king ambulance
Regional Influence
Truckler
Civil Rights
Below Average
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview People Government Economy Trend Analysis

The Dirty Cheats of Northern Bettia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Cutey Snugglekins with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, parental licensing program, and complete lack of public education. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 18.639 billion Gogs are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, with Law & Order also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Viagra. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Northern Bettian economy, worth a remarkable 5,588 trillion Groats a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Automobile Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 299,812 Groats, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,228,604 per year while the poor average 11,932, a ratio of 186 to 1.

Mobile phone masts are being erected all over the country, most academic research has ground to a halt, Animal Liberationists are regularly jailed, and otherwise healthy people are being sent to internment camps because they have VODAIS. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Northern Bettia's national animal is the Hello Kitty, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Voodoo.

Northern Bettia is ranked 82nd in Atlantian Oceania and 135,788th in the world for Most Primitive, scoring -245 on the Scary Big Number Scale.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 18 days ago

  • 16 days ago: Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Rudest Citizens (last census: #1).
  • 28 days ago: Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Largest Information Technology Sector (last census: Top 10%).
  • 31 days ago: Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Largest Retail Industry (last census: #1).
  • 34 days ago: Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Largest Mining Sector (last census: #1).
  • 43 days ago: Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Largest Cheese Export Sector (last census: Top 5%).
  • 46 days ago: Northern Bettia fell out of the regional Top 10% for Highest Police Ratios.
  • 48 days ago: Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Agricultural Sector (last census: Top 5%).
  • 49 days ago: Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Most Corrupt Governments (last census: #1).
  • 50 days ago: Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Publishing Industry (last census: Top 1%).
  • 50 days ago: Northern Bettia fell out of the regional Top 5% for Largest Publishing Industry.

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by Max Barry

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