The Dirty Cheats of Northern Bettia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Cutey Snugglekins with an iron fist, and remarkable for its enslaved workforce, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 19.236 billion Gogs are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.
The tiny, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, with Law & Order also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Viagra. Income tax is unheard of.
The frighteningly efficient Northern Bettian economy, worth a remarkable 5,767 trillion Groats a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Automobile Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 299,812 Groats, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,228,604 per year while the poor average 11,932, a ratio of 186 to 1.
Mobile phone masts are being erected all over the country, most academic research has ground to a halt, Animal Liberationists are regularly jailed, and otherwise healthy people are being sent to internment camps because they have VODAIS. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Northern Bettia's national animal is the Hello Kitty, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Voodoo.
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Stupidest Citizens (last census: Top 1%).
- : Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Agricultural Sector (last census: Top 1%).
- : Northern Bettia's influence in Atlantian Oceania fell from "Handshaker" to "Truckler".
- : Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Largest Basket Weaving Sector (last census: #1).
- : Northern Bettia's influence in Atlantian Oceania rose from "Truckler" to "Handshaker".
- : Northern Bettia fell out of the world Top 1% for Largest Trout Fishing Sector.
- : Northern Bettia fell out of the regional #1 spot for Largest Trout Fishing Sector.
- : Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry (last census: #1).
- : Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Most Pro-Market (last census: Top 5%).
- : Northern Bettia was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Extreme.