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The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee

“Guns, Germs, Steel, and really smooth Mochas!”

Category: Capitalist Paradise
Civil Rights:
Very Good
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Very Good

Regional Influence: Minnow

Location: Wysteria

OverviewFactbookPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee is a gargantuan, economically powerful nation, ruled by Generalissimo Barista Espresso with an even hand, and renowned for its complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, intelligent population of 25.675 billion Koffeeans are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, corrupt, pro-business individuals juggles the competing demands of Commerce, Education, and Law & Order. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Full City. Income tax is unheard of. A powerhouse of a private sector is led by the Automobile Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Information Technology industries.

Inter-species marriages are ignored by the government, the lowest age at which one can marry has been recently lowered to 12, fur coats have become the latest fashion trend, and only the rich can afford the latest medical innovations. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Koffee's national animal is the Schrodingers Cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its currency is the Cuppa.

Koffee is ranked 2nd in Wysteria and 32nd in the world for Smartest Citizens, scoring 58 on the Average Edu-tellignce® Test Score.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 1 day 5 hours ago

  • 1 day 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, only the rich can afford the latest medical innovations.
  • 1 day 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, fur coats have become the latest fashion trend.
  • 1 day 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, the lowest age at which one can marry has been recently lowered to 12.
  • 1 day 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, inter-species marriages are ignored by the government.
  • 3 days 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, the people are famous throughout the region for their bleached-white teeth.
  • 3 days 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, the government spends millions of Cuppas every year prosecuting spammers.
  • 3 days 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, the government is a law unto itself.
  • 3 days 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, surrealist houses shaped like mushrooms and volcanoes dominate the wealthiest neighborhoods.
  • 3 days 4 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, streaming video is considered to be a myth by most citizens.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, a typical fast food menu item could serve a small army.

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by Max Barry

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