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The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee

“Guns, Germs, Steel, and really smooth Mochas!”

Category: Compulsory Consumerist State
Civil Rights:
Very Good
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Few

Regional Influence: Minnow

Location: Wysteria

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The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Generalissimo Barista Espresso with an iron fist, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants. Its hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 24.767 billion are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, corrupt, pro-business individuals juggles the competing demands of Commerce, Education, and Law & Order. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Full City. Income tax is unheard of. A powerhouse of a private sector is led by the Automobile Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Gambling industries.

Much of Koffee's computer network is controlled by a rampant artificial intelligence, anti-government web sites are springing up, almost half of the child population live rough on the streets, and psychological disorders are a taboo subject. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Koffee's national animal is the Schrodingers Cat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its currency is the Cuppa.

Koffee is ranked 1st in Wysteria and 3rd in the world for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens, with 760 Whatever.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 1 day 4 hours ago

  • 17 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, psychological disorders are a taboo subject.
  • 17 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, almost half of the child population live rough on the streets.
  • 17 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, anti-government web sites are springing up.
  • 17 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, much of Koffee's computer network is controlled by a rampant artificial intelligence.
  • 17 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, citizens can be frequently spotted going about their business stark naked.
  • 3 days 5 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, Schrodingers Cats with strange deformities like three eyes and tentacles have been seen prancing through the countryside where industrial waste is dumped.
  • 3 days 5 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, children are brainwashed at a young age to accept "Love and peace!" as a way of life.
  • 3 days 5 hours ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, movies and computer games are strictly censored for violence.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in Koffee, fearful citizens watch their every move as does their government.

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by Max Barry

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