The Founder of Kitwe is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Leader with an even hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, public floggings, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 25.563 billion Kitweans are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kitwe. The average income tax rate is 27.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Kitwean economy, worth a remarkable 1,608 trillion cashes a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 62,924 cashes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

Prospective secessionists nervously declare how worthless and unimportant they are, the new prison system is crowding up at an alarming rate, the country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, and TV shows must meet strict ethnicity quotas. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Kitwe's national animal is the beast, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Kitwe is ranked 293,075^th in the world and 11,044^th in Osiris for Lowest Crime Rates, with 4.48 law-abiding acts per hour.