Spotlight on:

National Flag

The Free Land of Jacobs Cattlebean

“A clever man commits no minor blunders.”

Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Imploded
Political Freedoms:
Below Average

Regional Influence: Hermit

Location: Jacobs Cattlebean

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Free Land of Jacobs Cattlebean is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Leader with an even hand, and remarkable for its prohibition of alcohol. The compassionate population of 5.519 billion Jacobs Cattlebeanians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it devotes most of its attentions to Religion & Spirituality, with areas such as Commerce and Public Transport receiving almost no funds by comparison. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Jacobs Cattlebean City. The average income tax rate is 71%. The private sector is almost wholly made up of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out.

Nursing mothers are often arrested for indecent exposure, the capital of Jacobs Cattlebean has burned to the ground and caused riots throughout the country, the government struggles to keep up with the endless list of petrol disasters, and the nation is completely gun-free. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is crippling, and the police force struggles against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Jacobs Cattlebean's national animal is the Turkey, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, its national religion is a major religion, and its currency is the Tiny Ferret.

Jacobs Cattlebean is ranked 1st in Jacobs Cattlebean and 112,373rd in the world for Safest, scoring -1,537.2 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 1 day 10 hours ago

  • 1 day ago: Jacobs Cattlebean was reclassified from "Father Knows Best State" to "Inoffensive Centrist Democracy".
  • 1 day ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, the nation is completely gun-free.
  • 1 day ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, the government struggles to keep up with the endless list of petrol disasters.
  • 1 day ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, the capital of Jacobs Cattlebean has burned to the ground and caused riots throughout the country.
  • 1 day ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, nursing mothers are often arrested for indecent exposure.
  • 3 days ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, fancy dress parties are raided by military police for new recruits.
  • 3 days ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, tightly packed choir-boys sing the god-given joys of heterosexuality on public transport.
  • 3 days 12 hours ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, churches frequently hold public 'contraception burnings'.
  • 3 days 12 hours ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, flash floods that dams could have controlled regularly ravage small towns in mountain valleys.
  • 3 days 12 hours ago: Following new legislation in Jacobs Cattlebean, many of the country's largest dumps can be seen from space.

More...

by Max Barry

Latest Forum Topics