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The Impending baldness of Ethel mermania

“Damm the diabetes, I want chocolatety goodness”

Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Very Strong
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Minnow

Location: the West Pacific


The Impending baldness of Ethel mermania is a colossal, devout nation, ruled by Fearless Leader with an iron fist, and renowned for its complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 8.722 billion Ethel mermanians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Public Transport. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Great White Way. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 3%. A powerhouse of a private sector is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, followed by Retail and Beef-Based Agriculture.

Politicians accepting drinks in bars are executed for taking bribes, the fire protection service is wholly government-funded, new urban roads are threatening city parks, and only the rich can afford the latest medical innovations. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ethel mermania's national animal is the ethel merman, which is also the nation's favorite main course, its national religion is the cult of fearless leaderism, and its currency is the yid.

Ethel mermania is ranked 344th in the West Pacific and 16,310th in the world for Most Cultured, scoring 18 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 31 minutes ago


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by Max Barry

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