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The Great and Bestestest Duchy of Escyland

“Potestatem obscuri lateris nescitis”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Few
Economy:
Powerhouse
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Hermit

Location: The Hidden Mountains

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Great and Bestestest Duchy of Escyland is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by The Great Duke Ulol with an iron fist, and remarkable for its sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 21.717 billion Escylonians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Defence, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Escylonia. The average income tax rate is 100%. A powerhouse of a private sector is led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, followed by Uranium Mining and Arms Manufacturing.

Crime suspects are forced to submit to blood testing, it is illegal to make racist remarks in public, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets, and students are wary of colorfully decorated new teachers with names like Professor Pipsqueak. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Escyland's national animal is the Blast ended Screwt, which is also the nation's favorite main course, its national religion is Ulnogstic, and its currency is the Muffin.

Escyland is ranked 1st in The Hidden Mountains and 1,247th in the world for Most Dedicated Public Healthcare, scoring 208 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 22 hours ago

  • 19 hours ago: Following new legislation in Escyland, students are wary of colorfully decorated new teachers with names like Professor Pipsqueak.
  • 1 day 19 hours ago: Following new legislation in Escyland, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets.
  • 2 days 19 hours ago: Following new legislation in Escyland, it is illegal to make racist remarks in public.
  • 2 days 23 hours ago: Escyland voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Repeal "Liberate The International Communist Union"".
  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in Escyland, crime suspects are forced to submit to blood testing.
  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in Escyland, the EBI Channel Tunnel project is plagued by delays.
  • 5 days ago: Escyland voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Repeal "Commend Hobbesistan"".
  • 7 days ago: Following new legislation in Escyland, citizens who leave the country are officially classed as traitors.
  • 8 days ago: Following new legislation in Escyland, the police force is rumoured to be made up of evil shadows with no souls.
  • 9 days ago: Escyland was reclassified from "Father Knows Best State" to "Iron Fist Consumerists".

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by Max Barry

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