The Empire of
Iron Fist Consumerists
If love isn't working, you 're not using enough
Regional Influence
Minnow
Region
Civil Rights
Few
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Rare

Overview Factbook People Government Economy Trend Analysis

The Empire of Duzels is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Commisar Sombrero with an iron fist, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.998 billion Duzelsians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Law & Order, with Defense, Education, and Industry also on the agenda, while Spirituality isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sombrero City. The average income tax rate is 77.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Duzelsian economy, worth 610 trillion Bitss a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing and Information Technology. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 152,666 Bitss, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Recruitment posters proclaim the army to be both fabulous and fashionable, citizens are forced to donate blood once every three months, former school buses now regularly shuttle kids to the nearest shopping centers to work, and the government regularly crumbles under the pressure of terrorists. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Duzels's national animal is the Pony, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Ponyism.

Duzels is ranked 72nd in Pony Lands and 106,239th in the world for Stupidest Citizens, scoring 6 on the Average Edu-UNtellignce® Test Score.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Duzels, the government regularly crumbles under the pressure of terrorists.
  • : Following new legislation in Duzels, former school buses now regularly shuttle kids to the nearest shopping centers to work.
  • : Duzels was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Agricultural Sector.
  • : Following new legislation in Duzels, citizens are forced to donate blood once every three months.
  • : Following new legislation in Duzels, recruitment posters proclaim the army to be both fabulous and fashionable.
  • : Duzels was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Lowest Crime Rates (last census: Top 10%).
  • : Following new legislation in Duzels, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets.
  • : Following new legislation in Duzels, citizens must have a license to operate a computer.
  • : Following new legislation in Duzels, the nation's secret service is so secret that nobody knows if it has one.
  • : Following new legislation in Duzels, citizens are barcoded to keep track of their movements.

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by Max Barry

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